A few years ago at work, we had the option to take the Myers Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) test, which is basically a personality test that identifies key traits such as extroversion or introversion, sensing and intuition, thinking and feeling, and judging (this is more about order and preference for having things settled) and perception.
We took the written test, and then had an in-person working session to learn about the key traits and what they mean. The purpose was for us to better understand the point of view we’re coming from and our working style so we can collaborate better overall. I wasn’t shocked to learn I was an introvert (and mind you introvert is not synonymous with shy) because I’ve always preferred my alone time, and I’m never the first one to say what’s on my mind. I like to do some information gathering, mull over it in my head, make an informed opinion and then present it.
I was a bit nervous, however, looking at the room full of extroverts around me. My company as a whole is dominated by extroverts, which can make things like brainstorms and general work styles pretty exhausting for those who prefer to internalize and organize thoughts. I’ve made do, though, and have become more comfortable with the idea of throwing things out there and seeing what sticks.
But, that doesn’t mean I don’t think there are inherent benefits to the introverted working style either. Last night’s practice with Jenniferlyn was all about the four gates to speech. Words are so powerful, and these four gates provide a simple guide that can make all the difference to the person on the receiving end. Before speaking, you can ask yourself these simple questions:
- Is what you’re about to say true?
- Is it helpful to this person?
- Is it even necessary to say?
- Is it kind?
In particular, I like the last two questions because sometimes what we end up saying doesn’t actually need to be said. And when there are times something needs to be said, it can be said in a kind, rather than accusatory way.
What do you think about this kind of filter? Is it helpful? Do you think it’s missing something?